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A whole lotta nothing.
Jun. 17th, 2009 03:02 amI know I've been quiet. I'm not sure what it is. I'm reading and commenting on LJ, but I've been feeling like being quiet for right now.
It's not that there's not much for me to talk about - there is, and there's a lot going on in my head, but I haven't really had that desire to put it up here as it were. Maybe it's because, apart from one or two family issues that aren't that big of a deal, things are going really well, and life is changing for the better. All that means is there's a cynical part of me waiting for the other shoe to drop because I've learned to expect it. I shouldn't be expecting anything, but I guess it'll take some time for me to really learn that I'm OK for the first time in a long time.
I'm still in love and I'm still loved in return. Sam and I are doing well despite the distance, and I'll be visiting again next weekend, which will be fun. He'll be visiting here a month or so after, which means there will be panicked postings about cleaning my house and me freaking out over what I should cook. (I can't help it, I'm Southern. Even if he is my boyfriend and loves me no matter what, I have to be the perfect hostess and the house will have to be immaculate.)
I think part of the issue is that I've been disappointed in some people lately. Not anyone I know personally, but the authors of blogs I read and then some posts in a few communities I watch. It's kind of depressing to see how thoughtless and willfully ignorant some people can be. Really, it's not exactly news to me, but it seems to have been especially bad with all the crap happening in the world (Dr. Tiller's murder, the Holocaust museum, and now Iran). I also think I've reached that whole anger phase of the grieving process, and I feel confused and conflicted at times. What's funny is that it's not thinking about Dad that does it, but other stuff.
I've been writing. Not stories, but I have been world-building for my campaign, and I'm inching closer to being able to restart it. I'm kind of proud of myself and I'm actually feeling a little productive. It's also got me itching to write and actually complete the ten million things I've started and haven't gotten back to. It's amazing to realize I'm still recovering from the emotional hell that was 2008. (That reminds me, I should find my pencil and work on drawing up a map for my campaign.)
I guess the only other news is that I finally broke down and got myself a Nintendo DSlite, and it's awesome. I've beaten Chrono Trigger once, and I've also got the third ending on New Game+ by defeating Lavos at the start of the game with only Crono and Marle (without even meaning to do it - don't ask). I like some of the stuff they added for the DS, but other bits had me scratching my head. Even so, it's still an awesome game and I recommend it. I'll probably pick it up every now and then so I can unlock everything and get the other eight endings. I also have Mario Kart DS, and Diddy Kong Racing DS. The latter isn't nearly as fun as its N64 version, but still entertaining.
...and that's really about all there is at the moment. Wow, my life is boring. :p Don't worry. I'm going to be stressing about job hunting soon, and then in a few months, I'll be whining about the stress of moving to a new place and going back to school. :P
It's not that there's not much for me to talk about - there is, and there's a lot going on in my head, but I haven't really had that desire to put it up here as it were. Maybe it's because, apart from one or two family issues that aren't that big of a deal, things are going really well, and life is changing for the better. All that means is there's a cynical part of me waiting for the other shoe to drop because I've learned to expect it. I shouldn't be expecting anything, but I guess it'll take some time for me to really learn that I'm OK for the first time in a long time.
I'm still in love and I'm still loved in return. Sam and I are doing well despite the distance, and I'll be visiting again next weekend, which will be fun. He'll be visiting here a month or so after, which means there will be panicked postings about cleaning my house and me freaking out over what I should cook. (I can't help it, I'm Southern. Even if he is my boyfriend and loves me no matter what, I have to be the perfect hostess and the house will have to be immaculate.)
I think part of the issue is that I've been disappointed in some people lately. Not anyone I know personally, but the authors of blogs I read and then some posts in a few communities I watch. It's kind of depressing to see how thoughtless and willfully ignorant some people can be. Really, it's not exactly news to me, but it seems to have been especially bad with all the crap happening in the world (Dr. Tiller's murder, the Holocaust museum, and now Iran). I also think I've reached that whole anger phase of the grieving process, and I feel confused and conflicted at times. What's funny is that it's not thinking about Dad that does it, but other stuff.
I've been writing. Not stories, but I have been world-building for my campaign, and I'm inching closer to being able to restart it. I'm kind of proud of myself and I'm actually feeling a little productive. It's also got me itching to write and actually complete the ten million things I've started and haven't gotten back to. It's amazing to realize I'm still recovering from the emotional hell that was 2008. (That reminds me, I should find my pencil and work on drawing up a map for my campaign.)
I guess the only other news is that I finally broke down and got myself a Nintendo DSlite, and it's awesome. I've beaten Chrono Trigger once, and I've also got the third ending on New Game+ by defeating Lavos at the start of the game with only Crono and Marle (without even meaning to do it - don't ask). I like some of the stuff they added for the DS, but other bits had me scratching my head. Even so, it's still an awesome game and I recommend it. I'll probably pick it up every now and then so I can unlock everything and get the other eight endings. I also have Mario Kart DS, and Diddy Kong Racing DS. The latter isn't nearly as fun as its N64 version, but still entertaining.
...and that's really about all there is at the moment. Wow, my life is boring. :p Don't worry. I'm going to be stressing about job hunting soon, and then in a few months, I'll be whining about the stress of moving to a new place and going back to school. :P
