Bwahahahahahaha...

Found via brigidsblest. It was too funny for me not to share.

Jade. First Man, then Machine

That pretty much sums you up!

The Slogan Generator

I guess I really am impossible to please?

I don't think that word means what you think it does.

A minor note from the Queen Bitch of Triumph:

slan-der:

-noun
1. defamation; calumny: rumors full of slander.
2. a malicious, false, and defamatory statement or report: a slander against his good name.
3. Law. defamation by oral utterance rather than by writing, pictures, etc.

–verb (used with object)
4. to utter slander against; defame.

–verb (used without object)
5. to utter or circulate slander.

Your character has been caught stealing from local merchants once, and you have a sheet on your wikispace that brags about the number of times he has stolen. Three PCs witnessed your character torture and ultimately kill an unarmed and shackled prisoner. Your character has admitted he did these things. Those are what we call facts.

So, please enlighten me how, exactly, your character is going to be slandered by the witnesses who will be called to testify during your character's tribunal/court martial? They will be repeating facts under oath, and everything they will tell my NPCs will be the truth. That's not slander, it's testimony.

I understand you suddenly fear what the other PCs will think of your character, but you weren't too concerned about that when you threatened the baker who caught you stealing. You also haven't been too concerned when you have your character constantly talk down to the other characters. Your character is constantly acting like a jerk to the other PCs, and the GM team has received multiple complaints about you and your character. Oh, and your excuse for the murder? You didn't think an NPC with no armor or weapons would have so few hit points. Yet, you honestly believe an in-character event to account for what has happened OOC will suddenly make them think poorly of your character? Honey, their opinion of you hasn't changed, it already was that low.

The purpose of your IC/OOC punishment was two-fold: The first reason was to hit you with a clue-by-four and prove to you that actions do indeed have consequences. The second reason was so that we could show the other players that the Church really does want heroes. They don't want murderers and thieves in their ranks as they are trying to set an example. They want saints and your character's behavior wasn't exactly saintly.

Regardless of what you seem to think, I am not acting alone. Yes, I made the post to the forums outlining the course of action taken against you/your character and the reasons for it. Yes, I am the one who is pretty much running this tribunal/court martial, and my NPC is conducting the investigation. However, everything I have written and plan to do has been run by the GM staff for their approval first. Everyone has agreed to my ideas, and I had NinjaWeazel's seal of approval when I posted to the forum. I had nothing to do with your punishment - that was determined by Tempest and NinjaWeazel. The rp I am going to do will not affect you one iota. You've been punished and it's over. My task is to show that the Church does indeed have authority and some control over the heroes.

Finally, I'm sorry you think I'm the meanest GM on the team. I understand a few others are possibly afraid of me, but the honest truth is that I can't be bothered enough by it to care. People will think what they will, and I try to make sure the rules are enforced so that everyone can have a good time. Sometimes this makes me the bad guy, and I accept that. I know I'm also not all rainbows and sunshine, but hey, I'm not here to be your bestest friend ever. I'm here to have fun playing god advancing the plot and telling your characters' stories.

To sum up: We're not slandering your character. You do well enough on your own.

Sincerely,

The Meanie Poo-Poo Head, AKA Jade